Relationship Counselling
Individual and Couple Counselling and Help. If you want to have an Extraordinary Relationship
Counselling & Psychotherapy
Making changes in your relationships — why relationship psychotherapy or counselling can help you...
What if I changed my expectations?
I know I will never be able to change anyone to be how I want them to be. I can only ever change
- what I want
- how I feel
- how I act
- how I believe
Expectations can be the source of your greatest joy. The principles expanded upon in couple counselling include:
- understanding your self,
- being aware of your feelings and thoughts and using mindfulness to allow better relating processes to occur
- seeing the good side of things rather than the bad things in your relationship
- having a greater understanding and appreciation of your your partner's finer points (good and bad)
- better controlling your impulses and understanding how your emotions are are at play
- realising that when things are difficult it is often better to walk away and think about things before launching into attacK mode.
Couples sometimes seek pre-marital counselling to ensure a solid foundation for their relationship, their coming marriage or commitment ceremony.
Pre-empting issues, enables the couple (whether in a marriage or de-facto relationship) to move more easily from the limmerance or honeymoon stage to a more substantial relationship. In early relationship stages there is lot of acting and pretending.
In order to be loved or liked all of us do things to make the other person happy. Problems arise when we are not primarily making ourselves happy.
Pre-marital (or pre-relationship) counselling helps people discover the real reasons why they want to be together. Becoming aware, being mindful and being alert to issues allows early resolution and establishes a pattern that can last the entire relationship.
Long lasting relationships often refer to the openness between partners as being a critical ingredient. The self, togetherness and separateness All successful relationships have the components of separateness and togetherness.
The push and pull of relationships is just that. Being in touch with others allows us to have connection, feel support, share ideas and experiences, be loving and kind, thoughtful and considerate. Yet there is the ongoing desire to have our own space and ideas and time alone. It is this latter desire that often confuses us to believe that this is a feeling of selfishness and raises the guilt and perceived condemnation of others.
I say perceived because when we examine these issues most of would admit to wanting to get our own time and space alone. Once you learn what kind of person you want to spend the rest of your life with. You will more easily identify then when you run into them.
Only through discovering what makes your world move will you be able to truly identify realistic and achievable goals. Talking over your options this kind of counselling and coaching helps you achieve clarity in your goals.
Your expectations are well founded because you are laying the ground work before you start to make mistakes. When things do go wrong, often through things out of your control, you can learn ways to help you negotiate the difficult times in your life.
Some Topics we may explore throughout the sessions:
- Find out what you really want in a relationship or in a career
- Discover your true passions
- Find out what values drive you and the implications of this in choosing a companion
- Discover what other people are thinking about you and how this influences you
- What to do if you like the look of someone • How to keep other people interested in you
- How to develop your career and have it be your passion
- Find out how relaxation makes a difference in your relationships or your daily work
- Find ways to challenge your assumptions about yourself and other people
- How being assertive and speaking for yourself make a difference
By Philip Johnson Google